The first thing I note is that he does not apologies for his coarse language. 'HPtFtu' or 'the human propensity to fuck things up', is Spufford's interpretation of 'sin'. As he observes, 'sin' these days is more likely to be associated with 'speciality chocolate' rather than a state of disobedience from God. I had to read back to gather the meaning of this neologism, being essential to the plot and missed first time round.
The book, a gift from Dave and Fran Bennett, did help me crystallise some of my own thoughts about the impossibility of finding karma in theology. I was drawn to his awareness of wonderful 'coincidence', that he notes might just be God's loving presence. For example in a cafe after a particularly bad night of arguing with his wife, the medium of Mozart's clarinet concerto helps him realise God's presence and love, aiding him back to a better place. For me I desire something more convincing, but agree that the presence of God is in the ordinary, thereby ensuring faith remains faith.
Spufford spells out the challenge presented in defining 'God as Love'. He quotes Churchill from his cave in Croatia during the first world war, who though boredom, picked up the only book around, a bible. Half way though the old testament, he discards it saying 'God is a bit of a bastard.' That echos further though the dialogue as a retort to the difficulties that spring from simple solution. Surly there is a flaw in the theological idea that humans were created with the potential to succeed, when the odds were so much stacked against us? I muse this is a bit like materialising into a different world, as in the films 'Star-trek', or 'Back to the Future', only to find oneself at the wheel of a vehicle careering towards a precipice. "Ah I might have been able to make it, but no, just too difficult", I say as I fly over into oblivion.
This is God the creator. We observe creation set on it's various paths of destruction. Biological systems based around deception, cunning and avarice. The method; 'I eat you until you are gone, or I am in turn eaten'. ...And God said "it is good", meaning 'it functions well'. Nature, and animals are not moral beings. This biology within us; racism, violence and selfishness; is also termed 'survival'.
And yet, for some strange reason, I find that I have a driving instructor sitting next to me as we attempt the impossible route. Somehow my questions seem less sharp, less bitter. Questions remain, but so does the presence with me.
I find I am given a large uncashed cheque; all I could ever need. What do I do? That's the conundrum of live.
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