What do Carers Say they Need?

 

Sara Challice in her book “Who Cares?” (2024) says:

1) Carers need to first realise that they are carers.

2) Carers may think they are coping, when gradually,

     over time, they are not. Carers need to work out what

     they are doing, and make sure they are not creating

    co-dependence.

3) Carers need to talk and express how they are feeling.

4) Carers need a break.

Familiar themes from research are that carers need

1) To be heard, and receive an emotional and kind response.

2) To be informed (useful, timely, accessible information).

3) To be given practical support. 

Who is a Carer?

 

Young Carers Action Day Credit Creatarts.org.uk

Discussion

      Ø    Are you a carer? 

Ø    Have you been a carer? 

Ø    Might you become a carer?

Ø    Who in your family is a carer?

Ø    What are the care needs of your family?

Ø    How do you feel about this?

Preparing for Family Network Meetings

 Hindi Proverb

“But I have always loved my cow”

Imagine the scene.  A traffic jam; Car horns honking; people leaning out of windows exclaiming!  Worried locals looking frantically for Farmer Ajit. 

“Ajit, Ajit, your cow has sat down in the middle of the  highway and can’t be moved.

 The place has come to a  stand still.”

Calmly, Ajit stops what he is doing and walks purposefully towards the hubbub.  He gets down on his haunches and stretches his arm around his cow.  Gently he takes hold, and starts to lift up the cow. He inches step by step over to the side of the road and places the cow gently down.  The cow blinks its large eyes.  Immediately the roar of the traffic starts up again.  The people stand back in awe.  

“How did you do that Ajit?” they exclaim. 

“Oh, it’s nothing”, retorts Ajit.

“From a little calf, I have always loved my cow.  Everyday I tend to her needs and care for her.  From a young calf, I have  picked her up and carried her where she  needs to go.  

And today is no different.”

Watsan Walk for Water 21st June 2025

 Dear Friends and Family of the Leicester Starrs,

This is my information drop to tell you that I am facilitating a 16 mile walk in the Charnwood Hills of Leicestershire. 

We do this every two years to raise money for a Ugandan based water project called Watsan www.watsanuganda.org  

If you are willing and able. you are invited to join us on Saturday 21st June 9:30 at the Altar Stones in Markfield https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Altar_Stones_Nature_Reserve  LE67 9PX.

If you live miles/kms away, think of us on the 21st June.  

And yes, it would be very kind of you to support our fundraising efforts for our partners in Uganda doing the real work. 

https://www.stewardship.org.uk/pages/Starrs4water

Happy Easter

Christ Pantokrator in the apse of
the Cathedral of Cefalù, Sicily, Italy. 
Credit: Wikipedia

What do I need to do to live?  Eat and drink?  Well that's a good start.  But Jesus said...

"People do not live by eating bread alone, but on every word that comes from the Father."  

Jesus said to the woman at the well, "water can satisfy you for a moment, but I can give you living water that will mean that your needs will be met forever."

When we take Jesus' body and blood, we do not just revere it, sniff it, or genuflect before it.  We eat it and drink it.  It become part of our bodies and blood.  It mixes into to our whole existence and becomes undisguisable from our substance.  

We must do this, as Jesus insisted with Peter when he washed his friends feet, "I must wash your feet - it's essential."  

We understand and accept that we need Jesus to feed us, sustain us, provide all the nutrients we need to grow, and thrive. We are like so many young babies who are solely dependent on their mother's milk.

We do more than accept and obey; we are grateful, and honour our loving creator who has shown us how to live life to the full.

PRAYER: This Easter day I re reaffirm my vow, to honour, love, trust and obey you forever.

Lent 40 - Life giving II

L'amitié by Pablo Picasso
The hermitage, St Petersburg
Credit: en.wikipedia.org

“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. This is my command: Love each other." John 15

 One of the special things about the Creator's love for us, is that we can come boldly into their presence.

I am reminded of my friend who I was due to meet me on Friday, but forgot.  It struck me that this is a sign that our friendship is secure, because he was appropriately  not that concerned.  He knew that it will not affect our friendship.  It's the same with God.  I can be late, forgetful or annoying (though not advised), and do not need to fear any consequence, because the Creator makes themselves vulnerable to my imperfection.  They love me warts and all.

If I am late, am I fearful of disapproval?  Or do I genuinely not want to inconvenience my friend out of love?  Same with my Creator.  I am the mouse that runs across the great lion Aslan's paw, without a pause, and without fear. 

PRAYER:  Thank you for your great love that knows no bounds.

Lent 39 - Life Giving (Good Friday)

 

Desconsuelo by Eduardo Kingman
Credtarthistoryproject.com

 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:37-39 

A colleague recently reminded me of CS Lewis' book "A Grief Observed".   I wondered whether God felt the condition described by Lewis.  I pondered that when Jesus' died, did God the Father experience the dagger sink into the heart?  Did God have to be dragged into the church by two friends, either side, like my friend Doreen did when her son died?  Did God spontaneously burst into howling tears just because a thought flitted across his mind about his son and how he might have saved him, like my friend David did?  

Lewis says...

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing.

At other times it feels like being mildly drunk, or concussed. There is a sort of invisible blanket between the world and me. I find it hard to take in what anyone says. Or perhaps, hard to want to take it in. It is so uninteresting. Yet I want the others to be about me. I dread the moments when the house is empty. If only they would talk to one another and not to me.”  ― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

Lewis continues... 

“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, 'Blessed are they that mourn,' and I accept it. I've got nothing that I hadn't bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not imagination.” ― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

God has the advantage of having seen the 'film' many times before'.  The emotion is still the same, but point of the pain is understood, and whole picture is seen. The pain is endured within the context of joy.  We do not see from this perspective, but we know someone who can.  Let us stay close to that someone.

PRAYER: Nothing will separate me from your love!